In today’s fast-paced work world, the 1on1, also written as 1 on 1, has become one of the most valuable and underused tools for building better relationships at work. But let’s be honest — these meetings can sometimes feel awkward, unproductive, or even like a chore. If you’ve ever wondered how to make 1on1s actually useful, you’re not alone.
This guide is here to help you understand what a 1on1 really is, why it matters, and how you can get the most out of it — whether you’re a manager, team member, or just someone trying to connect better with others.
What is a 1on1, Really?
Let’s break it down. A 1on1 or 1 on 1 is a scheduled, private conversation between two people — usually a manager and a team member — but it can really be between any two colleagues. It’s not a status update or a project meeting. It’s a space to connect, share, and grow.
Imagine sitting down for coffee with someone who genuinely wants to hear what’s going on in your world — that’s the vibe a 1on1 should have.
Why 1on1 Meetings Matter So Much
You might think, “We talk all the time! Why do we need a 1on1?” Here’s why they’re special:
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They create trust. When someone listens to you without distractions, it shows they care.
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They help spot problems early. If something’s bothering you, a 1on1 is your safe space to bring it up.
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They’re great for giving and getting feedback. No pressure, no crowd — just an honest conversation.
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They give people a chance to talk about more than just work — goals, dreams, frustrations, and ideas.
How to Prepare for a 1on1
You don’t need a PowerPoint or a script. Just a little intention can go a long way. Try these before your meeting:
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Jot down anything you’ve been thinking about — good or bad — that you haven’t shared yet.
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Reflect on how things are going for you lately. Is there something you wish could be different?
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Be honest with yourself: Are you being heard? Are you doing work that matters to you?
That’s it! Even a few sticky notes with your thoughts can make a 1on1 much more valuable.
What to Talk About in a 1on1
The best 1 on 1 meetings are flexible, but a few great topics to explore include:
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Feelings about work: Are you motivated? Burnt out? Just okay?
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Career growth: Where do you see yourself heading? What skills do you want to build?
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Feedback: Is there anything you’d like to say, but haven’t yet? Or something you’d like to hear?
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Team dynamics: How’s the vibe on the team? Is collaboration going well?
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Personal wins and struggles: It’s okay to bring your human side. We all have stuff going on.
If you’re a manager, the best thing you can do is listen more than you speak. This isn’t your show — it’s a two-way conversation.
Making the Most of Every 1on1
Once you’ve got a rhythm going, you can make 1on1s something everyone actually looks forward to. Here’s how:
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Be consistent — don’t keep rescheduling. That signals it’s not important.
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Keep it informal — coffee chats, walking meetings, or video calls work just fine.
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Follow up — if someone shared something meaningful, check in later. That shows you care.
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Don’t rush — even if it’s just 30 minutes, make sure it feels unhurried.
The best 1on1s feel more like check-ins with a trusted friend than meetings with an agenda.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Even with the best intentions, 1on1s can go off track. Keep an eye out for these traps:
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Talking only about tasks — this is about people, not projects.
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Not showing up — canceling often sends the message that people’s time isn’t valued.
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Doing all the talking — if you’re the only one speaking, it’s not really a conversation.
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Avoiding hard topics — the hard stuff is exactly why 1on1s matter.
A Final Thought: 1on1s Are About Connection
At the end of the day, the real power of a 1on1 lies in its simplicity. It’s a human conversation. A space to slow down, check in, and build real connections at work. Whether you’re managing a team or simply working alongside others, mastering the art of the 1on1 can make your work life not just more productive, but more meaningful too.
So next time that recurring calendar invite pops up, don’t sigh — smile. You’ve got a chance to make something great happen, one conversation at a time.